Prayer requests for a soul who feels abandoned by God

Hey everyone, I'm really lost and don't know what else to do, so I'm asking if you could please pray for me.

Long story short, I was diagnosed with depression way back in '09. Ever since then, I've tried everything under the sun, and for about the last 6 years I've been stuck at home, in a really deep depression. Even with meds, some days I can't even get outta bed. I've tried to take my own life a bunch of times, the last time was just a few weeks ago.

About a year and a half ago, I decided to turn to Catholicism (never been super religious before), kinda influenced by this girl I have feelings for. And for about a year now, I've been watching masses, rosaries, and novenas online (since I can't leave the house) morning, noon, and night, begging God to help me because I just can't take living like this anymore.

But I don't think God hears my prayers, or if He does, He doesn't care. I know I'm not worthy (so I'm not even mad at God for not listening), but God's silence is making me lose what little faith I had left.

I've spent the last few days in agony, not getting out of bed, crying a lot. So, sorry in advance if this text is kinda all over the place, but I'm writing this through tears of desperation. I'm just asking for prayers, please...