Had a nde a while ago

I thought I was religious but I was just scared of going to hell lol I kinda was spiraling at rock bottom so I went on a hard bender for “clarity” I was drunk for a few days doing whip it’s smoking and acid. I was so mad at God I was asking why was I forsaken, why is He punishing me the whole 9 bearing my soul 😂

That being said, I’ve Been on my fair share of trips and have experienced all kinds of things time loops, telepathy once, by this point I thought Ive done seen it all , but I could feel this was different af from all of them my instincts were ringing. I was so broken I didn’t care I felt like God abandoned me (which I found out later was actually hell lol) I was about to crashout.

Took a massive rip of nitrous and was holding it in and my Body felt like it moving, I could see through my eyelids and I can tell I’ve changed places my whole body. I wasn’t panicking but I was trying to take in what’s going on

It was like I was in space, pitch black,with no stars just completely darkness but I could tell my body was moving and I was cold an uncomfortable chill. I thought I might still be holding the nitrous in so I felt my chest and didn’t feel shit Still was calm but I thought to myself “is this really it Jesus?” It echoes next thought “I mean so what if I’m dying” same thing 😭 I decided to speak and as soon as I said “Am I, dying?” Out loud Everything stopped and I saw the biggest bright light I thought it was the Sun. Thought crossed my mind it might’ve been my soul.

it felt so warm, and I felt comforted by it. then I heard the deepest most authoritative voice I ever heard in my life I felt like a child all it said was “No.” and I popped back to where I was. Dude 💀 me and God been super tight ever since fr this time. But I was like did I almost die?😂