Step kids moving out

Wondering if anyone else went though this. My step kids are 20, 18 & 15 .., boys, I had two adult twin sons when I met my husband (married 10 years). I’ve always felt that the boys already have 2 parents so I stood back, except in really annoying situations. The ex has never held a full time job. For the first six years of our marriage she was controlling but then met a great guy, had a kid, she gets to stay home & things were good. But then my husband lost it on my 20 year old SS because he’s never held an actual job (mom enables by paying him to watch the baby). He only does food delivery if he wants money (owes my husband $$$$ for insurance/car repair & maintenance..for car we gave him, phone, etc). So after he moved back to moms, 18 yo graduated with his Dads blessing he makes his moms his home. ( I get it, older brother is his BFF and he always was moms boy). So 15 year still comes every other day & weekend. We do a lot of fun stuff with him but I feel like he’s always missing his brothers. It really sucks for my husband because I know he feels it too. Plus the older ones, only come if he reaches out and pays for whatever we are doing. I’m over trying with the older ones. Their step dad is going to get sick of supporting my husband entire family or they’ll wake up one day & realize they should’ve taken the jobs with his company that he offered. (Easy and good paying jobs) … BUT I can’t stop obsessing about them choosing mom. My son works for my husband too… for over a year and does really well and likes his job.