I'm struggling a lot with various addictive behaviors and I think I need help or at least some encouraging advice

I didn't know what to flair this but I'm seeking support or some such, I suppose.

I'm undiagnosed but very confident I have ADHD. I've been in this sub for a while and found it very helpful and relatable and I keep telling myself that I'm going to seek a diagnosis after the holiday or this busy season at work or what have you but honestly I keep forgetting to look into it when I have the time. I'm also wary of getting a diagnosis and possibly trying to get medicated if that's what seems best during an ongoing shortage. I'm uncomfortable with the possibility of making things harder for others when I'm technically managing okay.

But I'm not. I'm really struggling. I also have a strong history of depression and anxiety, both of which I'm diagnosed with and I'm in talk therapy for my anxiety attacks. I'm struggling with PTSD from a trauma in my adulthood as well as possible C-PTSD that all seems linked, and I've also been growing more confident that I may be autistic. I'm not tied to one outcome of that or another and won't be seeking a diagnosis for that but it does make sense of a lot in theory.

I'm not sure what even happened but this season it feels like my ability to cope with much of anything has just dissolved in my hands. I think I may be developing alcoholism. I'm struggling to avoid taking a shot of vodka (or two OR THREE) before or after difficult events. I'm gaining weight, it's losing it's efficacy, and I'm struggling to avoid it as a crutch. I'm tired more and I'm getting frequent headaches.

I'm also struggling with emotional eating junk food (sugar and salt mostly, my cravings get intense) and when none of that is grabbing me or doing the trick, I've gotten into a bad habit of overspending. Buying junk I know I don't need but feels important in the moment, throwing it all on a cc I'll have to pay later. I'll live, my bills are getting paid and it's almost tax return time but it's really annoying that so much of it will have to go to paying for crap I could have avoided buying plus interest if I gave myself the decency of two seconds of forethought.

Now my clothes barely fit (I've been wearing the same pair of pants to work every day for almost two weeks because they're all that fits me) I have no energy, don't feel good, and it all just makes me want to dive in deeper.

Sorry this is so long, I just wanted to get it all down. I'm going to the gym this week but I don't know if I'll be able to keep up the habit without some help or accountability. I don't have a very big community, I'm not in a relationship and I live alone. I don't have a lot of alcohol left at home and I'm hoping to adopt an attitude that once it's gone I won't buy more but I just don't know how to get through difficult situations anymore and what I consider difficult has becoming looser and looser in definition. I'm trying to tell myself it just doesn't fit into my calorie budget, which is true.

I'll wrap it up there but I would love any advice you can give. Thank you so much, this community is amazing.