The thought of going through another year is daunting

I need to vent to people who get it. I'm not going to hurt myself. I just am really struggling to imagine going through another year. We're a blended family and the relationship with my stepdaughters mom is terrible. She hates my husband still 12 years later just for taking all his parenting time. I don't know why anyone wouldn't want a pretty normal, present biofather in their kids life but here we are. My daughter's father abandoned her and it is fucking heartbreaking. I'm not looking forward to trying to map out summer break with her lack of flexibility. Trying to adjust so my stepdaughter can do every and all extra curricular she wants while her mom refuses to reply to texts trying to get more info so we can participate or adjust pickup/drop off so she can do it. Seeing her show up to my house week after week, verbally abusing my husband and talking shit about my family to my stepdaughter who's clearly uncomfortable. Forcing her (a 12yo with pretty difficult ADHD) to be the one in charge of managing her relationship with us and including us in her life. We need to hire a lawyer to get after her for not coparenting but all that always costs at least $2000 and if it gets to a judge (and costs an additional $2-4k) because her mom won't just mediate, they usually just say "hey stop that" then give zero consequences, which she knows.

I can't do this anymore. It's exhausting. I love my stepdaughter so much so I will keep doing it but holy fucking hell, am I burnt out on fighting for the right to show up for this kid. Just looking to vent, no amount of advice will fix this.