I just want my endo to go away

Is it bad that sometimes I just want to get surgery for my endo? The reason we have avoided surgery is because I’m 24 and my gyno does not want to risk my fertility. Her reasoning is 100% understandable and I sided with her. But since that decision at my appointment about 8 months ago, my pain has increased significantly and is now constant rather than limited to my period. I am constantly in lower stomach and pelvic pain, constantly bloated, experiencing constant issues with bowel movements and urination, etc.

When this pain was limited to just before and during my period, it was semi-manageable. But now it is different. It is constant and it is uncomfortable. I want to feel normal again. Maybe I’m being dramatic but I’m just frustrated right now.

I know surgery isn’t the magical answer to these issues.. but in my past appointments with my gyno, she implied that any other measures (birth control, iud) we take would just be preventative measures - slowing down the growth of my cysts/endometriomas, pain management, stuff like that - nothing that would necessarily “fix” me, just slow down/avoid the need for surgery. I was perfectly okay with that and we were exploring the idea of an IUD, as I’m no good with pills.. but we haven’t even begun that process and the pain has doubled and become constant. Maybe an IUD would solve a lot of this. But her implication that it was more of a preventative measure/pain reliever than a solution stresses me out. Additionally, would an IUD relieve the pressure the cysts are putting on my kidneys? Would it get rid of all of my pains? I’m not a surgeon and do not have any medical background, so who am I to say what the best path is for my situation.. but I can’t help but wonder if surgery would be the better option. I’m just frustrated and have clouded vision on the situation. My family doctor believes surgery may be the path my gyno goes down this time around just based on my recent ultrasound results. But ultimately they want to leave the decision up to my gyno, so I guess we’ll see what she has to say at my upcoming appointment with her later this month.

I am just frustrated and want this to go away. And I know I’m being dramatic.. this has just become a big inconvenience, annoyance, and pain for me. Thank you for reading my rant if you’ve managed to get this far, it is very much appreciated. Have a great day :)