i feel intense anxiety even through a screen

i don't know how to deal with this.. it's an issue im very ashamed of and i don't know how to get over it. any time i have a social interaction i feel lost and i don't know how to continue, if anything i want out

it would be expected that at least online, where i would be safe from in person activities id feel better? but i do not, i feel. nervous and i avoid checking my notifications, or i look away from text messages to prolong time before i have to answer

i leave for long periods of times and i come of as a jerk i would assume. what do i do?